6 days ago
One maybe at a time. And then hopefully before I know it, I'll run out of maybes and I will finally be okay.
For now, I'm still wishing the pain away. The hurt the disappointment the despair the nausea the panic the fear the hopelessness the sadness the ache.
Some days it does feel like I can keep going, that I am stronger than I feel and that I will be okay.
Other times, I find myself standing in the middle of anywhere at all while the world swirls around me. I blank, nothing is in focus, and all I feel is a never-ending spiral of darkness.
Those are the times that scare me the most; I don't even feel present in those moments.
It must be exhausting, huh? To have depressed people in your life, on your timeline. It's okay to admit it, y'know? I'd be tired of it too.