5 minutes ago
I am shadow. I am light. In a moment I can be petty, aggressive, defensive - protecting the inner little girl. In the same moment I can be expansive, loving, wise, and channeling a truth higher than what I always practice. My mind judges. My mind separates. My mind is still very much in my ego. My mind carries stories that keep me isolated, make me feel that my pain is unique, that I struggle and that no other being can understand the burden I have chosen to hold. And my work is to transcend the mind, watch the patterns of the mind, and behave in a way that reflects my highest understanding - rather than react based on my triggers and desire to defend the wounded parts of myself. In one moment my words are violent, in another my words uplift. In one moment my inner life is a dark storm, in another it is a wave of gratitude and peace. You may hear a tale of me in my ego. You may hear a story of my strength and grace. Trust both. Know both are true. I am as much a child as I am a queen. As much a fighter as I am a peace maker. As much a sinner as I am a saint. As much a human as I am divine. I am growing, I am shedding, I am transforming. And I am human. Real. Raw. Working through my patterns. Bringing awareness to where my work and focus must go. I will disappoint. I will inspire. I will be a hypocrite from time to time. I will take responsibility for my lack of awareness in moments when I contract and am triggered by my own limitations. I cannot promise much, other than that I committed to sharing my inner life. A constant flowing, shifting, evolving state of sadness, of grief, of anger, of bliss, of gratitude, of love, of ecstasy. And I will be at peace with my eyes in the mirror knowing that in any moment, in my moments of being a tyrant or of being a servant, I am doing the best I can to be raw, real, transparent, and true to the guide within. I am flawed. I am working. I am growing. I am sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.