5 days ago
I’m just a person, with a story...aren’t we all? Today I speak up as someone who grew up with an alcoholic, mostly-absent father and a mother who dearly loved me, but covered her insecurities and pain with exaggerated self-righteousness and willfulness. Our home was rife with unhealthy mindsets, poor communication, and fractured relationships, and I unknowingly carried all of that dysfunction with me into adulthood. Years later my family legacy presented itself with onerous force, and the only choice I had was to come to an honest acceptance of the genetic and emotional baggage that had been bequeathed to me and my loved ones.
I don’t share this outright on social media much, because it is so misunderstood by people who haven’t experienced it firsthand, and is often stigmatized and judged unfairly, at times even by those living in the midst of it.
Ironically, though, sometimes the most priceless gifts can be disguised inside the most devastating struggles. To be honest, if I had not been forced to peel back the layers of my destructive childhood experiences, I wouldn’t be the person I am today - stronger, kinder, more mature, more resilient, and more respectful of my impact on others. The people whom I’ve met through this journey are the “family” I choose to keep in my life. They are some of the most REAL people out there - honest, open, humble, compassionate warriors. Connecting on a deep, genuine level has made the pain bearable and worth the difficult lessons that had to be learned.
Overcoming a legacy of family dysfunction is possible. It takes time, focus, and patience. We learn to love ourselves first, and then we can share that love with others in healthy ways, allowing them the freedom to find their own way. .
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